How do I convince my friend to let her daughter live with us?

My friend is actually a terrible alcoholic - vodka and pot/meth. She works evenings and weekends and when she is home, she goes off and bitches at her daughter (14) until like 3:00 a.m. She won't even buy her tampons! Her daughter has been nearly a part of our family since she was about 5, and is more like a sister to my own kids. We pay for many of her school expenses and apply discipline the best we can in the situation. I'd love to help her out, but not sure how to handle the situation with her mom. This girl needs a stable home and a safe place, also a family who appreciates her. We've tried social services, they've been contacted many times. But the mom just lies her way out of it, or sleeps with the counselor they assign, so that's not an option. How do I convince her to let her child go?How do I convince my friend to let her daughter live with us?
Buy her off- I know it sounds crude but drug addicts and alcoholics care about one thing only, their next fix. You have to apply to their way of thinking. Have the papers drawn up by a lawyer and be prepared for confrontation. If the offer is high enough the addict in question will take it. Like I said it sounds crude but its a better solution for the child. CPS will only take the kid from one unsettling home to another that may or may not be better than the previous.How do I convince my friend to let her daughter live with us?
Talk to the child make sure she wonts to live with you and tell her every thing that you are will to do for her just so she can be in a family that loves her like she is you own! (probly does!) and I would take her mother to court and fight for her all you should have to do is prove the mother unfit (shood be pretty easy whith your sitsation!) but befor talk to her mother and tell her what your going to do oh any by the way if you keep call social services they will have to do some thing about it call them on a weekly bases if you have to!





best of luck to you and the girl!...
I feel SO bad for all of you!


But, it's great that you care so much, and are a beacon of hope.


What I want to say that you should do, is not practical and would get me in trouble, somehow, even if only through karma, but it's mean, and effective.


OK, that (not) said,


just be who you are right now.


I liked the part of getting her a female counselor.


I wonder, if she ';ran away';, would they force her back?


Or would they let you have her?


Sometimes, the squeaky wheel gets the grease!


When my father's wife wanted to throw me out for being pregnant, her own sister-in-law would have taken me out of the home for girls.


They won't pay for and house a person that a family memebr will take, I can tell you that!


Government's a littel different, but if you have do everything but sleep with the caseworker yourself, I don't see why you can't swing it your way.


Life is a game, and some people do indeed find the rules behind the rules.





But, as far as a mom giving up her kids, that's even harder than asking people to stop having sex once they've started. It's the strongest instinct we have, just about, so forget it.


Those of us who let go, let go because we ourselves make that call, no one else.


Good luck!
that wouldn't be right.. have the government handle that.. if her mother could just squeeze her way out of it. then let the daughter talk to the proper authorities with your help..
lol that's nice thinking mental %26gt;D


-


you just need to get the daughter to do the talking, 14 year-olds can leave home, right? I don't see much difference in leaving home and moving into another family's house.
Get social services to hire a female counselor first of all. Secondly, maybe you could ask the daughter what she'd prefer. If she wants her mom, that's her mistake. But if she wants you, your friend will realize what she needs to do. (hopefully)