How do I deal with an abusive, alcoholic father?

I'm staying with my father temporarily, just until I find a suitable place soon. I'm a grown man and he still insults me all the time, and talks to me like I'm a naughty little kid. I go out of my way to try to get along but he seems to go out of his way to bully and insult me. Sometimes I think the only way to live in peace is to stop visiting and seeing him completely.How do I deal with an abusive, alcoholic father?
when he raises a hand on you, grab it, twist it back and tell him that if he ever does that again you are leaving, never coming back, and hell never hear from you.





other than that you can just leave to a friend's place or something because dealing with that isnt right...





or if youre anywhere in cali you can stay with me.How do I deal with an abusive, alcoholic father?
You said yourself it's only temporary. I guess sometimes you have to pick your priorities. I find it strange that you even chose to live with him in his home, and then complain about his behavior. You should consider yourself lucky he's allowed you to stay with him until you...as an ADULT male..can find a way to take care of yourself.
You need to go to the program that Alcoholic's Anonymous has to help dependents of Alcoholics cope with this. It's a program made especially for this. You can't really deal with an Alcoholic or an abuser. Whatever some cyber-psychologist might say to you might possibly make things worse.





Good luck and hang in there.
You may be right about not seeing him. That could be what he needs to get help.
a baseball bat to the knee will learn him
are u over 18? if u are, get out find a friend that u can stay there for a lil bit untill u find ur place i mean i know its kinda hard i had the same problem with my dad but i just couldnt take it anymore
try going to an alanon meeting





www.alanon.com
You can't deal with an abusive alcoholic. With addicts the addiction always comes first. Also by living with him you are what AA calls an enabler. This is complicated but enablers act as targets, this is the type of enable you unfortunately you have become. The other kind of enabler helps the achololic some way with money, helping with the rent, buying groceries etc.





Unfortunatley the only thing you can do with an Alcoholc is to cut them out of your life 100 percent. This is what AA recommends. Alchololics never make an effort to change until they hit absolute bottom, and then only slightly less than half decide to get help.





The other thing you should do is start attending Al-Alon meetings. Addicts of all kinds are very good at manipulating people, especially people who have feelings for them. You need to get support for yourself to deal for what is perhaps the most difficult thing a person who is related to an alcoholic has to do. You can find the number of a group of your area of town in your local telephone book.





You should also move out immediately. I'm sorry about your situation, it's sad I know. But with alchololics in their minds it's you that has the problem, not them and what you said at the end is the only way to handle this situation, have no contact whatsoever. It's hard I know.
Kick his ***.
As long as you're living with him, at least treat him with courtesy, as he is not required to let you stay with him once you're an adult.
Go with your instincts, and stop visiting him. The alcohol is talking, and if he's not willing to stop, there is really nothing you can do. Ask yourself this: would you put up with this behavior towards you by a stranger? Then why would you put up with it by your OWN FATHER?!!





I would try to find a suitable place ASAP, and, until then, grin and bear it, because you never win when you fight or argue with an alcoholic. I'm sorry, and I wish you well.





Remember one thing, when he puts you down and belittle's you, GOD DON'T MAKE NO JUNK!!
take solace in the fact that you are a well-adjusted man who will NEVER be like your father.
pour water into the vodka bottle and mix that up good, just make sure it isnt too noticable for him
Call a talk show and deal with it that way.
I certainly do understand.





It seems like some people just have a problem with their son from day 1. (and, some mothers with daughters)





It could be jealousy that he felt when you were just a baby 7 he never even acknowledged it himself.





My mother has always been negative about everything I do %26amp; the way I look even with me middle age %26amp; her elderly now. I suffered many years of anorexia %26amp; other problems that therapists say was due to her negative attitude towards me.





I love her, I take care of her, %26amp; I will never understand her!





But, it helped me to be a better mother to my own 3 children! I never insult them or make negative comments. I try to encourage them.





I moved away from my Mom at age 16 %26amp; never went back until last year %26amp; that is because she had a stroke %26amp; needed help.





It would be better for you to get out of there %26amp; live a more positive life.





My husband was like that with my 16 year old son, but I knew how his father had treated him. I did confront him about it several times, and he even admitted that he had always felt a little jealous of our son. But, he has really tried to just not say anything at all if he cannot say anything good, although he still slips sometimes.





if only people could show love!





Your father was probably mistreated himself.





Good luck!
you a grown man so gt out of that abusive environment and free yourself from that lifestyle. good luck my friend i will be praying for you
stop seeing him...He is bringing you down from your manhood....visit him later when your ready . Thank goodness you have choices !!!
I think you answered your own question. I know what u r going thru. It sucks worse than anything.
This is one of the most difficult things in life to deal with. You





need all the emotional help you can get. Locate an ALONON


(Don't know if I spelled that right.) organization it is for children (even adult) of alcoholics. They have a ton of information for you and will give you proven advise, moral support.
just give him more booze....soon enough, his liver will start to fail
When you live off of someone, you have to take their bs. When you live on your own you don't. Plain and simple.





He is what he is. You see how ugly it is. Make sure you don't follow his lead and you become the man you wish he was. And you treat your kids like you want to be treated when you have kids. And pray for him. That is about all you can do.
you answered your own question they will not change unless they want to and most of the time they won't have had alot of experience in this and they are always right and no one else has brain. so if i were you i would leave as fast as you can and dont' leave forwarding address. take care.
Get help for him?If he doesn't want that then don't completely avoid him. ODn't argue back.