How do I quickly find an Al Anon meeting that is a good fit for my situation? Help!?

(sorry if this is a bit lengthy)





I live in Portland, Oregon and my husband is an active alcoholic in total denial. He is not in any way a physical threat to our family. In fact, we hardly see or hear from him because he drinks and sleeps pretty much 24-7. To complicate matters, he has some health issues that make him weak...which is part of the reason why he sleeps so much but it is mostly from depression and drinking.





We have two young children and I'm not at a point where I want to leave him..but I just need to know how to deal with this. I'm very overwhelmed! I've tried everything to get him to open up to help but he has no interest.





I went to two Al anon meetings in my area but there were a few problems that I'm hoping I can avoid experiencing again. I also overall need to find the right group:





1. Both groups were large (over 50 people).


2. Both groups spent most of the time going over rules and regulations, discussing minutes from last meeting, etc. It actually got very boring.


3. During one meeting (my first time there), the group played ';tag'; and took turns choosing a person from the group at random to ';discuss their situation.';. Being new, I didn't want to speak but I was ';chosen'; and felt awkward saying ';no'; and spilled out my story. It was very uncomfortable and I felt like I was in middle school all over again being chosen to speak in a group situation. I don't mind talking about my situation but I didn't feel comfortable doing so in that group.





Being a parent with children and living with an active alcoholic, I was hoping to find a more specialized group of al anon and, hopefully, smaller. Is there a way I can seek out the right group without visiting each one?





Thanks ahead of time.How do I quickly find an Al Anon meeting that is a good fit for my situation? Help!?
((hugs))





Here's a link to Al Anon for the Portland Area. I suggest you call them and ask them which groups are smallish. There won't be any groups specifically for people in your situation.


http://www.al-anonportlandoregon.org/





It's possible that you won't find a place where you fit. It sounds like you need help and don't have a lot of time to shop for meetings.





You might consider getting some Al Anon books and finding an online forum where you can get the support and guidance you need.





Here's alink to Al Anon online:


http://www.ola-is.org/





Here's a link to books:


http://books.shop.ebay.com/Nonfiction-/3鈥?/a>





%26lt;3 TM