It's really important that you leave and go to your Uncle's if this is an option. I say this because the only way your Dad will ever get sober is if he starts losing things that matter to him, whether it's home, job, daughter, freedom, car, whatever. That's what causes an alcoholic to ';hit bottom'; and he hasn't hit his yet. And when you leave, do NOT listen to promises that he'll stop. He needs a support group like AA and probably a supervised detox, so just because he claims he's gone 2 nights without drinking, this is a far cry from being sober.
I know it's hard and you'll worry. But if if helps any, you have no choice. Then, at your uncle's , do 2 things. First, start looking on craigslist for group homes. These are a blast and cheap! You get your room and then share the home with a couple others. It's a great way to meet people.
I would also strongly enoucrage you to go to Alanon. This is a gift you can give yourself, because you'll not only meet people, you'll meet ones who understand exactly what you are going through. This is SO important, because you won't feel alone for the simple reason that are you aren't alone.Should i move out of my alcoholic dad's house?
really to help you go to aa, even though your not drinking it will help you,ok, moving out well maybe after you go to some meetings it will open your eyes, your enabling him by putting up with his bs.
you will find support at those meetings,they are there to help.
really what is normal you know, everyone has something up or down in life. aa will help, meetings all the time day or night
Find an Al-Anon meeting. You sound like you're in pain, and experiencing ';co-dependent'; issues. Please find a meeting so you can get real help from people who've been there. Also check out online communities in the meantime, like ';In the Rooms.'; Good luck!
My dad's an alcoholic too. My mom and family ended up leaving him a couple of months ago. If i were you i'd talk to him about the situation. At least try to convince him to seek help.
G'day Praetorian,
Thank you for your question.
I'd move in with your uncle if he is a prospect. You shouldn't live in misery due to your Dad's problems.
Urge him to go to counselling if he'll listen.
Best wishes.
Try to raise money to rent or buy a house. If you don't want to stay alone, stay help your dad before it too late, TRUST ME, and I live in CRAZY place.
i think you should try to move out and try to get help for your dad.. it will be hard but it will probably do you alot of good if you get out.. its not healthy to be scared and trapped everyday sorry :( best of luck
Your dad is your dad. That will never change. No matter what he raised and took care of you. Be there for him. What else is there in this world?
Try attending Al-anon meetings. They will help you separate your feelings of worry for your dad, and trying to live his life for him.
Try to help your dad, talk to him, maybe theres a way he can stop drinking
Well personally I think you should move out. At your age, its generally a good idea no matter what your parents situation is. Also this is really something that your dad needs to deal with and fix on his own. A lot of the time family members will feel like they have to help the person with an addiction or that they're responsible for taking care of them. Really there is only so much you can do though, and you have to live your own life at some point. Its his responsibility to take care of himself and deal with his drinking on his own, not your responsibility.
You might want to see if there is an alanon meeting in your area, that is like a support group for people who have family members who are alcoholics, sort of related to AA I think. My husband and my best friend both went to alanon and alateen when they were teenagers/younger adults due to family members with drinking problems. I think it helped them a lot to deal with this kind of stuff, also it might just be good to talk with other people in similar situations if you are feeling alone?
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/
i have 2 answers. first off, have an intervention. get anyone together who loves ur father and ask him to get help. find a place that could offer him help that maybe is covered by the state. or check out a%26amp;e.com and check the intervention info on there. i think they tell you of places to get loved ones help.
second. i would say give your dad an ultimatum also. tell him he needs to quit drinking or he will be out of your life. not too sure. i watch intervention a whole lot, and i also grew up with a mother who was addicted to pills/alcohol and later on meth. i had to also make a choice. she started using meth and was being a horrible mother to my 13 yr old brother and 15 yr old sister. i was 20, and i gave her a choice...get help and change, or i would tell my dad and she would lose custody of the kids for good. (they are divorced) anyways, she didn't get help, and lost the kids, and finally, 3 yrs later, my mom is finally sober off of everything. anyways, message me if u need any advice. i have been through SOOO much with addiction.
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